I have used the Internet ever since my dad got dial-up working somewhere between 1998-2000. Ever since then I've been glued to the magic of Internet. But what people don't often recoqnize is that they all leave a hefty footprint of what they are doing, and no I don't mean the carbon footprint you hippie bastard, I mean the Internet Footprint.
The following is my Quest for Erasing my Internet Footprint (or trying to lower it at least):
The first step you should always take is first see how much there is about you on the Internet. Now for this you should use the good ol' Google Search BUT bear in mind there are other search systems out there as well that function cardinally differently, so I Bing'd myself aswell.
What I found on Bing was, like Bing itself, useless (luckily) basically just some of my Facebook friends and petitions I've taken part of.
What I found on Google was a bit more worrying. My Twitter, my OLD Twitter, Facebook, Blogs, Formspring and continued. For 11 pages. Oh boy... I guess this will take TIME...
Step 1. Old Twitter. Retrieve password, confirm with phone number... after all that crap you can finally deactivate your account BUT there's a twist, deactivation =/= deleteion, all your followers and followings disappear but the account itself stays there. Hopefully not for long, probably forever...
Internet 1:0 Me
Step 2. Formspring. Why did I ever get one? Ooh first time I used ESToomere as an username! Doesn't matter, this has to go. Oh thank THOR it still has me logged in! SUCCESS! It still has me on Google but now it just links to a picture with a sleeping puppy.
Internet 1:1 Me
Note 1. Apparently there's an actor named Erik Silver on IMDB and an accountant on LinkedIn. Interesting.
Note 2. And some important tennis guy. Gay.
Step 3. Steam. I won't even bother with that right now...
Internet 2:1 Me
Step 4. Shitty Freewebs page. Oh boy... I was afraid of this! Must destroy all the shadows of my past! I SUMMON THE SUN! Ooooh crap this has like a metric shit-tonne of personal information on me... ERIK FROM 7 YEARS AGO, WHY YOU SO DUMB? First, got to find a way in... recover the password from Hot.ee? Gah, what's the password for my Hot.ee!? ...I actually just guessed it. Winning. Now, is the horror mail from Freewebs here? YES, and passwords to bunch of old crappy sites I created with Freewebs, deletion AHOY!
MULTI-KILL, 3 crappy websites DOWN!
Internet 2:4 Me
DONE! I win!
Monday, May 2, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Why are we HERE?
Earth.
A chunk of minerals in its own little path around the bulbing hot star we have grown to call the Sun.
The sun on the tip of a collection of other stars and dust.
The galaxy in a vast mass of galaxies we simply call the Universe, the one collection of all that is.
The location is certain. The purpose and how remains a secret to us... forever?
We may speculate and theorize on and in the ways of how everything became to be.
Us, humans, the solar system, the damn Universe itself.
This purely is another theory based on my observations of the modern world. And to summarize? Parasite.
Us humans are parasites.
We consume.
We consume the very Earth we live on.
Based on observations from NASA we can safely say that there are no planets like our Earth in our near vicinity, thus the consumation of our planet is amazingly parasitical.
We consume till there's nothing left.
We're running low on everything.
Green movement? Bullshit, just a minor bump in the road to destruction.
Space travel to colonize other planets? Yeah, the lunar landing over 40 YEARS ago.
At this point it is clear that our purpose on this Earth is to just consume it.
So continue acting like the good consumers you are and ENJOY your fucking life. There is no purpose other than to consume till there's nothing left.
FUCKING ENJOY YOUR LIFE!
CONSUME AND PARTY HARD. We all will soon die anyway.
A chunk of minerals in its own little path around the bulbing hot star we have grown to call the Sun.
The sun on the tip of a collection of other stars and dust.
The galaxy in a vast mass of galaxies we simply call the Universe, the one collection of all that is.
The location is certain. The purpose and how remains a secret to us... forever?
We may speculate and theorize on and in the ways of how everything became to be.
Us, humans, the solar system, the damn Universe itself.
This purely is another theory based on my observations of the modern world. And to summarize? Parasite.
Us humans are parasites.
We consume.
We consume the very Earth we live on.
Based on observations from NASA we can safely say that there are no planets like our Earth in our near vicinity, thus the consumation of our planet is amazingly parasitical.
We consume till there's nothing left.
We're running low on everything.
Green movement? Bullshit, just a minor bump in the road to destruction.
Space travel to colonize other planets? Yeah, the lunar landing over 40 YEARS ago.
At this point it is clear that our purpose on this Earth is to just consume it.
So continue acting like the good consumers you are and ENJOY your fucking life. There is no purpose other than to consume till there's nothing left.
FUCKING ENJOY YOUR LIFE!
CONSUME AND PARTY HARD. We all will soon die anyway.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Iraq leaflet
Lumberjack Commando
“Lumberjack” Advertisement for the Canadian Armed Forces
(French: Forces armées canadiennes or baguette baguette baguette)
Tired of sitting home?
Tired of chopping down trees with your bare hands?
Tired of watching hockey and moose in your nearest forest?
If you can answer at least one of these questions with a brave Canadian howl of ‘YES!’ then you sound like a guy we need!
Presenting for the first time in Canadian history:
THE LUMBERJACK COMMANDO
The Lumberjack Commando is a special branch of the Canadian Armed Forces that is comparable to the United States Marine Corps.
That’s right! The professionalism of the USMC in the goodness that is Canada!
What’s it in it for you? What’s NOT in it for you!? Here’s a list:
You get to serve in the manliest armed forces seen ever since the days of Sparta!
Beards are a MUST in the Lumberjack Commando!
You get to wear bulky suits that make you look even MORE manlier!
No hat looks silly on you!
You get to sing ‘O Canada’ with a manly tear in your eye!
People will take pictures of you and post them on the Internet thus making you internationally known!
Canada doesn’t have enemies so you get to fight wars initiated by third parties!
Why are you still reading this document? JOIN NOW!
Here are the ways how:
The Internet: http://www.forces.ca/lumberjack
or
Your closest recruitment center
LUMBERJACKS ALL THE WAY!
(French: Forces armées canadiennes or baguette baguette baguette)
Tired of sitting home?
Tired of chopping down trees with your bare hands?
Tired of watching hockey and moose in your nearest forest?
If you can answer at least one of these questions with a brave Canadian howl of ‘YES!’ then you sound like a guy we need!
Presenting for the first time in Canadian history:
THE LUMBERJACK COMMANDO
The Lumberjack Commando is a special branch of the Canadian Armed Forces that is comparable to the United States Marine Corps.
That’s right! The professionalism of the USMC in the goodness that is Canada!
What’s it in it for you? What’s NOT in it for you!? Here’s a list:
You get to serve in the manliest armed forces seen ever since the days of Sparta!
Beards are a MUST in the Lumberjack Commando!
You get to wear bulky suits that make you look even MORE manlier!
No hat looks silly on you!
You get to sing ‘O Canada’ with a manly tear in your eye!
People will take pictures of you and post them on the Internet thus making you internationally known!
Canada doesn’t have enemies so you get to fight wars initiated by third parties!
Why are you still reading this document? JOIN NOW!
Here are the ways how:
The Internet: http://www.forces.ca/lumberjack
or
Your closest recruitment center
LUMBERJACKS ALL THE WAY!
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
seitseteist pluss kaks
Tuba. Kergelt kollaka tooniga. Uksepoolses osas on nari, aknapoolses seinas aken kust kohiseb alatihti külma Põhjamaa kliimat sisse. Jääkuninganna buduaar. Aimdust sellest küll ei anna peale temperatuuri miski; seinal on Eesti lipp. Akna vastasolevas seinas on laud. Laual kuhi raamatuid; küll üks räägib tumedadest kunstidest, teine teismeliste ja vampiiride vahelistest suhetest; kae seal on ka üks austusega Druididele, taamal teine võluritele. Use vastasseinas on peegel, iga daami toa ilmselge osa! Küll on ta andnud valu inimestele kell puudub peegel, küll teistele on ta tekitanud pooltosin pluss üks aastat ebaõnne - muidugi teenitult. Lamp on talle saanud südamelähedaseks, talle muu lamp küll väga ei istu - pole randoomsuse austaja.
Suured mustad kardinad muudavad niigi külma toa veelgi tumedamaks ja hirmuäratavamks ent samas kuidagi kutsuvalt... koduseks.
Kõik need pildid ja ämblikud aga ei aita kaasa araknofoobidele.
Talle meeldib neid kokku lugeda: üks, kaks, kolm, neli, viis, kuus, seitse, kaheksa, üheksa, kümme, üksteist, kaksteist, kolmteist, neliteist, viisteist, kuusteist ja seitseteist.
Seitseteist pluss kaks; üks voodis, teine kapis muude luukerede vahel.
Voodialune on delikaatne võrgustik sõna originaalses tähenduses.
Kapi oma on ühte koljusse sarnase moodustise tekitanud, ripub praegugi silmaaugus.
Mõlemad on ta head sõbrad, voodialune tuiab ka niisama mujal ringi, tekitab võrke kui austusmärke jääkuningannale, jääkuninganna jätab neid ka aegajalt alles, et neid tõesti imetlete. Kapi oma ei taha aga välja tulla kartes repressiooni.
Ta lemmiksõna? Müsteerium. Nagu see sõna on müsteerium sest ta ei avalda seda, ta ainult narrib ja õrritab sellega aga ei avalda. Jääkuninganna.
Suured mustad kardinad muudavad niigi külma toa veelgi tumedamaks ja hirmuäratavamks ent samas kuidagi kutsuvalt... koduseks.
Kõik need pildid ja ämblikud aga ei aita kaasa araknofoobidele.
Talle meeldib neid kokku lugeda: üks, kaks, kolm, neli, viis, kuus, seitse, kaheksa, üheksa, kümme, üksteist, kaksteist, kolmteist, neliteist, viisteist, kuusteist ja seitseteist.
Seitseteist pluss kaks; üks voodis, teine kapis muude luukerede vahel.
Voodialune on delikaatne võrgustik sõna originaalses tähenduses.
Kapi oma on ühte koljusse sarnase moodustise tekitanud, ripub praegugi silmaaugus.
Mõlemad on ta head sõbrad, voodialune tuiab ka niisama mujal ringi, tekitab võrke kui austusmärke jääkuningannale, jääkuninganna jätab neid ka aegajalt alles, et neid tõesti imetlete. Kapi oma ei taha aga välja tulla kartes repressiooni.
Ta lemmiksõna? Müsteerium. Nagu see sõna on müsteerium sest ta ei avalda seda, ta ainult narrib ja õrritab sellega aga ei avalda. Jääkuninganna.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
The epic travel to the location socially known as: school
Exciting look into my exciting walk to school filled with excitement!
*Taam-taam-taam-taam* Hitchcocki "Psühho" tuntuima stseeni muusikalinetõus täitis mu toa enda madalakvaliteetse MIDI helinaga. See on mu äratus. Ma lükkan ta üheksa minutit edasi ja keeran teise külje. Üheksa minutit hiljem sama asi jälle, kordan sama protseduuri. Nii veel paar korda veel. Lõpuks ajan end üles kell kuus kolmkümmend ning loen inglise keele kaks teksti lõpuni. Lõpetan nendega kell seitse ja vaatan veel Näoraamatu üle, siis kähku duši alla, gruuming standard paika, riided kähku selga, kott kokku ja kohe õue bussi peale. Bussipeatus on väga lähedal ja ei võta üldse kaua aega et sinna jõuda. Väljas on juba nii mõnus ja valge, isegi linnukesed laulavad. See -20 kraadi ei kärise üldse nii hullult.
Hüppan number 63 peale ja kütan kesklinna suunas teele. Peale Poska peatust märkan trammi. Kreutzwaldis hüppan bussi pealt maha ja sätin sammud trammipeatuse poole, sinna saabub peagi number üks mis küll Tondile ei vii aga Hobujaama küll. Hobujaama jõudes astun maha ja märkan kaunist neiut. Hobujaamas pean ootama 2 minutit ning saabub ka number kolm millega saab Tondile. Vabaduse väljakul ronin maha ja sätin sammu kirdesse, valgusfoori juures aga kerge puänt ja suund kagusse, siis aga jälle kirdesse ja koolis ma ka olen!
*Taam-taam-taam-taam* Hitchcocki "Psühho" tuntuima stseeni muusikalinetõus täitis mu toa enda madalakvaliteetse MIDI helinaga. See on mu äratus. Ma lükkan ta üheksa minutit edasi ja keeran teise külje. Üheksa minutit hiljem sama asi jälle, kordan sama protseduuri. Nii veel paar korda veel. Lõpuks ajan end üles kell kuus kolmkümmend ning loen inglise keele kaks teksti lõpuni. Lõpetan nendega kell seitse ja vaatan veel Näoraamatu üle, siis kähku duši alla, gruuming standard paika, riided kähku selga, kott kokku ja kohe õue bussi peale. Bussipeatus on väga lähedal ja ei võta üldse kaua aega et sinna jõuda. Väljas on juba nii mõnus ja valge, isegi linnukesed laulavad. See -20 kraadi ei kärise üldse nii hullult.
Hüppan number 63 peale ja kütan kesklinna suunas teele. Peale Poska peatust märkan trammi. Kreutzwaldis hüppan bussi pealt maha ja sätin sammud trammipeatuse poole, sinna saabub peagi number üks mis küll Tondile ei vii aga Hobujaama küll. Hobujaama jõudes astun maha ja märkan kaunist neiut. Hobujaamas pean ootama 2 minutit ning saabub ka number kolm millega saab Tondile. Vabaduse väljakul ronin maha ja sätin sammu kirdesse, valgusfoori juures aga kerge puänt ja suund kagusse, siis aga jälle kirdesse ja koolis ma ka olen!
Monday, February 14, 2011
NATURALISM
A small text on the mathematics test in the naturalism flow of literature. Enjoy and/or vomit.
Ma vaatasin seda erutavat kuhja enda ees. Ma teadsin, et ta on must parem kuid ma siiski tahtsin teda teha. Ma ihalesin selle järele ehkki mul ei olnud kogemusi. Mul puudusid kõiksugu teadmised, ma olen ainult natuke kokku puutunud sellega ja ka need kogemused olid devasteerivad mu hingele. Pole hullu küll ma hakkama saan, ma pean lihtsalt puutuma tema tekstuuri, võtma endasse iga detaili ja kontrastiaimduse ja siis... ja siis ma alustan ja ei lõpeta enne kuni mu käsi on läbi kulutatud ja ta on täis märgitud minu hellade kuid siiski mingil määral rangete märkidejada.
Ma vaatasin seda erutavat kuhja enda ees. Ma teadsin, et ta on must parem kuid ma siiski tahtsin teda teha. Ma ihalesin selle järele ehkki mul ei olnud kogemusi. Mul puudusid kõiksugu teadmised, ma olen ainult natuke kokku puutunud sellega ja ka need kogemused olid devasteerivad mu hingele. Pole hullu küll ma hakkama saan, ma pean lihtsalt puutuma tema tekstuuri, võtma endasse iga detaili ja kontrastiaimduse ja siis... ja siis ma alustan ja ei lõpeta enne kuni mu käsi on läbi kulutatud ja ta on täis märgitud minu hellade kuid siiski mingil määral rangete märkidejada.
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